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Why do I hate the sound of my own voice?!

One question I get a lot from voice coaching clients is why do I hate the sound of my own voice?! I get it. Loads of people feel uncomfortable or dissatisfied with the sound of their voice, for lots of different reasons. I’ve listed a few below:

Hearing the sound of your voice differently

When you speak, you hear your voice through vibrations in your skull. This can give you a different impression of how your voice actually sounds in a recording. It can be a bit of a fecking shock or even uncomfortable to hear your recorded voice played back to you.

Cultural expectations of how your voice sounds

Society has certain (outdated and unfair *eyeroll) expectations around what types of voices are desirable or authoritative. This makes people feel excluded and self-conscious about their own voices if they don’t fit these norms. If you have an accent you don’t hear much on telly or a feature that has been publically shamed for no reason (I’m looking at you vocal fry attackers…!) it can really knock your confidence.

Personal insecurities about the sound of your speaking voice

In some cases, people may feel dissatisfied with their voice. These insecurities or negative beliefs about themselves, which can manifest in different ways, can nearly always be linked back to what someone has said about their voice in the past, or even to point one; feeling like they don’t sound how the world expects them to.

Lack of familiarity with your recorded voice

You might not be used to hearing your voice played back to you, so it can feel unfamiliar or uncomfortable. This comes back to the fact that it will literally sound different to start with. But also if you’re a new podcaster or suddenly going live on social media to promote your business, it will take a wee bit of time to get used to! Have patience.

Your voice is unique, it’s wonderful and it will have its own, individual qualities that make it special. It’s who you are.

If you hate the sound of your own voice or feel self-conscious, think about why you feel that way. Reflecting on this can really help you move forwards. And remember us vocal coaches (*waves) don’t just help with the technicalities of the speaking voice, we also help you have confidence, feel more comfortable with your voice and fecking own your space. Have a listen to this ep of The Voice Coach Podcast for more tips on loving your voice.

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